Twas the night before donis, and all through the Keep,
All the magi were wakeful, who should be asleep -
And Tristan and Morgaln and Belmos, good men,
Were just getting ready to do it again.
Aunite Em in her Attic, and I in my room,
Were both settling down in the midwinter gloom -
When out in the Commons arose such a riot
The Librarian lost it and hollered for quiet.
So everyone rushed out to see what it was,
But they didn't see anything out there because
There just didn't seem to be anything there.
Then i squinted my eyes up and studied with care -
When what to my Magickal Sight should appear
But a transparent sleigh with invisible deer.
With a shadowy driver, half-dark and half-lit :
(apparently Remy's new batch was a hit.
Unlike Auntie Em'ly, who rations her stuff,
Refusing to serve those she feels had enough -
Good Remy will bless all who put up the gold,
And cheerfully lubricate til you're out cold.)
Having overindulged in the holiday booze,
and woken up covered with owl tattoos,
He wobbled and belched, waved a bottle of beer,
And called to his reindeer with drunken good cheer -
Down cider! Down lager! Down brandy and rye!
Thanks to Aunt Em and Remy, I'll never go dry!"
Then he rode with his load to each room in the Keep,
But with all the excitement, no one was asleep.
He cussed, and he fussed, and he stamped a plump foot,
(Which, instead of the presents, left ashes and soot)
Then he rode with his load to the heart of the Keep,
And, dumping the gifts in a glittering heap,
Said to Tristan and Morgaln and Belmos et al -
"Well, it's YOUR problem now - have a holiday ball!"
And I heard him exclaim as he rode from the Keep :
"(hic!) The show's over, folks - get your butts back to sleep!"
All the magi were wakeful, who should be asleep -
And Tristan and Morgaln and Belmos, good men,
Were just getting ready to do it again.
Aunite Em in her Attic, and I in my room,
Were both settling down in the midwinter gloom -
When out in the Commons arose such a riot
The Librarian lost it and hollered for quiet.
So everyone rushed out to see what it was,
But they didn't see anything out there because
There just didn't seem to be anything there.
Then i squinted my eyes up and studied with care -
When what to my Magickal Sight should appear
But a transparent sleigh with invisible deer.
With a shadowy driver, half-dark and half-lit :
(apparently Remy's new batch was a hit.
Unlike Auntie Em'ly, who rations her stuff,
Refusing to serve those she feels had enough -
Good Remy will bless all who put up the gold,
And cheerfully lubricate til you're out cold.)
Having overindulged in the holiday booze,
and woken up covered with owl tattoos,
He wobbled and belched, waved a bottle of beer,
And called to his reindeer with drunken good cheer -
Down cider! Down lager! Down brandy and rye!
Thanks to Aunt Em and Remy, I'll never go dry!"
Then he rode with his load to each room in the Keep,
But with all the excitement, no one was asleep.
He cussed, and he fussed, and he stamped a plump foot,
(Which, instead of the presents, left ashes and soot)
Then he rode with his load to the heart of the Keep,
And, dumping the gifts in a glittering heap,
Said to Tristan and Morgaln and Belmos et al -
"Well, it's YOUR problem now - have a holiday ball!"
And I heard him exclaim as he rode from the Keep :
"(hic!) The show's over, folks - get your butts back to sleep!"
